I'm pissed now. But I must move on. Practise zen...
"Ommmmmm....."
It'snotworthit.It'snotworthit.It'snotworthit.
It's at times like these that I really treasure my 老朋友 :) Even if you can't trust anyone around you, you know they're still there haha.
Yippeee. 吃的很饱，很爽! Woohoo.
Haven't you wondered
Why I'm always alone
When you're in my dreams
Friday, August 31, 2007
foundation
I never thought things will be more complicated in university. In fact, it's starting to look like a secondary school/JC-esque war zone. Maybe cuz we overcomplicate matters by our own doing.
Oh well. At least I've learnt something from this: there's no point in anger, and it doesn't resolve anything. It took me quite a while to realise this though. Oh and that goes the same for grudges. Sometimes I wished girls can be more like guys, as in slightly more able to forgive and forget.
I'm reminded about the verse in Ephesians, something about not letting the sun go down on you while you're angry, cuz it'll let the devil gain a foothold in your heart. Something like that, I can't remember exactly haha. It's true isn't it? You tend to do really stupid things when you're mad (and I can bear testament to that haha). Things that only end up hurting those around you, and instead of getting what you set out for in the beginning, you only distant yourself from others.
Sometimes I can't really separate the good from the bad.
I need to "renew my mind" and be more Christ-like. And stop acting like a hypocrite.
My fingertips are holding onto
The cracks in our foundation
And I know that I should let go, but I can't
Oh well. At least I've learnt something from this: there's no point in anger, and it doesn't resolve anything. It took me quite a while to realise this though. Oh and that goes the same for grudges. Sometimes I wished girls can be more like guys, as in slightly more able to forgive and forget.
I'm reminded about the verse in Ephesians, something about not letting the sun go down on you while you're angry, cuz it'll let the devil gain a foothold in your heart. Something like that, I can't remember exactly haha. It's true isn't it? You tend to do really stupid things when you're mad (and I can bear testament to that haha). Things that only end up hurting those around you, and instead of getting what you set out for in the beginning, you only distant yourself from others.
Sometimes I can't really separate the good from the bad.
I need to "renew my mind" and be more Christ-like. And stop acting like a hypocrite.
My fingertips are holding onto
The cracks in our foundation
And I know that I should let go, but I can't
Sunday, August 26, 2007
i know in whom i have believed
"Record my lament;
list my tears on your scroll -
are they not in your record?"
- Psalms 56:8
"My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever."
- Psalms 73:26
Indeed, I know in whom I have believed, and He will never let me down. The world may disappoint but at least I know there is one constant in my life, who will never ever abandon me. He'll see me through every sorrow and every joy. For this I rejoice in His name :)
Anyway, WWF outing on Fri was fun!! It's like old times again haha. I can't wait to meet everyone again!! Now we're all waiting for Jamie to upload the photos haha.
But shucks, the weekend's over :( Damn. I really don't wanna go to school. And I don't understand how something so simple can become so far-fetched. It's almost like making a mountain out of a molehill. I guess I can't, and never will, understand some people. I'm glad I have other more predictable people around me.
list my tears on your scroll -
are they not in your record?"
- Psalms 56:8
"My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever."
- Psalms 73:26
Indeed, I know in whom I have believed, and He will never let me down. The world may disappoint but at least I know there is one constant in my life, who will never ever abandon me. He'll see me through every sorrow and every joy. For this I rejoice in His name :)
Anyway, WWF outing on Fri was fun!! It's like old times again haha. I can't wait to meet everyone again!! Now we're all waiting for Jamie to upload the photos haha.
But shucks, the weekend's over :( Damn. I really don't wanna go to school. And I don't understand how something so simple can become so far-fetched. It's almost like making a mountain out of a molehill. I guess I can't, and never will, understand some people. I'm glad I have other more predictable people around me.
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
pro-active
I'm tired, but I'm restless. And I think I've been sleeping way too much for my own good. So why do I still feel so lethargic?
Hmmm, so I finally got my Biz Comm module, after calling the CELC woman like 4 or 5 times. She thought I was urgent so she decided to give a slot to me haha. Thank God :) I think it's at times when you finally decide to leave it all up to Him, rather than continually rely on yourself, that things will change for the better. You'd think it'll be easy to just give in to His will, but most times, our pride stops us from doing so. We like to think we're strong and capable enough to solve our own problems, and ultimately forget who's the potter and who's the clay.
But then again, I realise I should be more pro-active in solving my problems, rather than sit around and whine and complain all day long. I should learn to help myself a bit more next time.
Ok, now that school has started, it's back to the good old days of tutorials, tutorials and more tutorials, with dreadful mid-term tests in between. Oh and lectures. Sigh. I have forgotten how to be a mugger. Not that I was ever one in the first place haha.
I'm starting to miss my sec school and jc buddies though. Haven't seen them for such a loong time. We have to meet up!! If everyone's not too busy, that is.
But there you go for the last time
I finally know now what I should have known then
And I could still be ruthless if you let me
Hmmm, so I finally got my Biz Comm module, after calling the CELC woman like 4 or 5 times. She thought I was urgent so she decided to give a slot to me haha. Thank God :) I think it's at times when you finally decide to leave it all up to Him, rather than continually rely on yourself, that things will change for the better. You'd think it'll be easy to just give in to His will, but most times, our pride stops us from doing so. We like to think we're strong and capable enough to solve our own problems, and ultimately forget who's the potter and who's the clay.
But then again, I realise I should be more pro-active in solving my problems, rather than sit around and whine and complain all day long. I should learn to help myself a bit more next time.
Ok, now that school has started, it's back to the good old days of tutorials, tutorials and more tutorials, with dreadful mid-term tests in between. Oh and lectures. Sigh. I have forgotten how to be a mugger. Not that I was ever one in the first place haha.
I'm starting to miss my sec school and jc buddies though. Haven't seen them for such a loong time. We have to meet up!! If everyone's not too busy, that is.
But there you go for the last time
I finally know now what I should have known then
And I could still be ruthless if you let me
Sunday, August 19, 2007
phone snaps part 1
Here are some phone snaps from the past few months, especially during rag :)
FOC. Disturbing Shikun and his SP hahaha.
Lorry rides.
Business school at 7am in the morning.
Our float at the Padang!
Night time view of old Parliament House.
Back at Business after the big day.
FOC. Disturbing Shikun and his SP hahaha.
Kaishi and me, at Timbre!
Timbre (the stage)
Lorry rides.
Moving house, literally.
Business school at 7am in the morning.
No, we haven't slept.
Our float at the Padang!
The Padang. Looks like a picnic right? Except that the canvasses on the ground are for sleeping haha.
Night time view of old Parliament House.
O sex goddess, please give us good figures like yours.
Back wall part 2.
Back wall part 1.
Back at Business after the big day.
Ready for dismantling :(
Oh well, that's all I have for now. The other photos are all over the place with different people haha. Shall post the link someday else.
Friday, August 17, 2007
wait
This waiting is killing me. It's so stupid. I'm actually waiting to see if my appeal for my modules gets through. And so far I've only got 1. 1!! WTF am I supposed to do with just 3 modules this sem?!
I need to get all 3 modules I've appealed for! Not just 1?! I'm going for SEP, so how do you expect me to finish as many of my core modules in time if I only have 3 modules, out of which only 2 are core?? Rawr!!
I'm ready to kill someone right now, and a million expletives are running through my head. The tension and suspense are becoming too much for me. I feel even worse than what I feel before I look at my results. Has the school administration ever considered the feelings of people like me, before they go about setting up such a stupid system?? Or before they go about allocating only 4 (1 more just came in, whoopdedoo) modules to people?
I need to get all 3 modules I've appealed for! Not just 1?! I'm going for SEP, so how do you expect me to finish as many of my core modules in time if I only have 3 modules, out of which only 2 are core?? Rawr!!
I'm ready to kill someone right now, and a million expletives are running through my head. The tension and suspense are becoming too much for me. I feel even worse than what I feel before I look at my results. Has the school administration ever considered the feelings of people like me, before they go about setting up such a stupid system?? Or before they go about allocating only 4 (1 more just came in, whoopdedoo) modules to people?
Thursday, August 16, 2007
And so school has finally started. I wonder where my 3 months of holidays went to... They seemed to have passed by in a blur. And you'd think 3 months is a very long time. Now I know it's definitely not haha.
Probably cuz I spent half of my hols in school. So that when I went to school on Mon, I didn't feel the unfamiliarity of stepping back into the place. Instead it felt just like any other day, cuz I still see the same faces I've been seeing 24/7 for the past month haha.
But of course you can't help but feel that things have changed with some people. You're no longer sitting beside the same people you sat with last semester. New friendships have been formed, older friendships have been strengthened and some other friendships have been abandoned. I'm happy about having new people to sit next to, but I still feel a sense of loss over those that have been left out in the cold. I wonder if they ever predicted 3 months ago, that they'd be sitting outside the fray. That the mistakes they'd make will have such severe consequences.
In a sense, I guess humans being humans are hard to forgive and even harder to forget. I think sometimes our self-righteousness gets in the way of our ability to empathise with others. We think that because we can deal with situations better than them we have the right to judge them and we put ourselves on a higher pedestal than them. It's not fair I know, but I'm guilty of that sometimes haha. At least I've learnt quite a few things during this hols. Things like what to say and what not to say in front of certain people.
Oh well. I'm just sad that things have to turn out this way. In a way, it's just like being back in secondary school. But then again, things weren't so complicated then. The good thing from all this is that at least I know who are the ones whom I can really trust :)
And speaking about school, I'm NOT prepared!! I think I'm currently still in lala mode haha. It must be cuz after associating school with FOC and rag for 2 months, I'm finding it hard to associate it with an academic institution haha. Like what it's supposed to be.
And I just got a haircut, and now I look damn kok. Sigh.
Update: Omg I'm damn pissed and frustrated right now. FFFFFF. I went to school for absolutely nothing! I hate CORS, and the damn bidding system that got me into this freaking mess. I never thought there'd be a day where I'll be so desperate to study something. I'm practically begging for my modules. ARGH. Shit. It's so unfair.
Oh, if you only knew.
If I could I'll take you with me but I'm here and you're there.
Probably cuz I spent half of my hols in school. So that when I went to school on Mon, I didn't feel the unfamiliarity of stepping back into the place. Instead it felt just like any other day, cuz I still see the same faces I've been seeing 24/7 for the past month haha.
But of course you can't help but feel that things have changed with some people. You're no longer sitting beside the same people you sat with last semester. New friendships have been formed, older friendships have been strengthened and some other friendships have been abandoned. I'm happy about having new people to sit next to, but I still feel a sense of loss over those that have been left out in the cold. I wonder if they ever predicted 3 months ago, that they'd be sitting outside the fray. That the mistakes they'd make will have such severe consequences.
In a sense, I guess humans being humans are hard to forgive and even harder to forget. I think sometimes our self-righteousness gets in the way of our ability to empathise with others. We think that because we can deal with situations better than them we have the right to judge them and we put ourselves on a higher pedestal than them. It's not fair I know, but I'm guilty of that sometimes haha. At least I've learnt quite a few things during this hols. Things like what to say and what not to say in front of certain people.
Oh well. I'm just sad that things have to turn out this way. In a way, it's just like being back in secondary school. But then again, things weren't so complicated then. The good thing from all this is that at least I know who are the ones whom I can really trust :)
And speaking about school, I'm NOT prepared!! I think I'm currently still in lala mode haha. It must be cuz after associating school with FOC and rag for 2 months, I'm finding it hard to associate it with an academic institution haha. Like what it's supposed to be.
And I just got a haircut, and now I look damn kok. Sigh.
Update: Omg I'm damn pissed and frustrated right now. FFFFFF. I went to school for absolutely nothing! I hate CORS, and the damn bidding system that got me into this freaking mess. I never thought there'd be a day where I'll be so desperate to study something. I'm practically begging for my modules. ARGH. Shit. It's so unfair.
Oh, if you only knew.
If I could I'll take you with me but I'm here and you're there.
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