Because Blogger always happens to be down when I feel like writing something, I'm jotting this down on TextEdit (Mac's version of notepad) first. On the same note (haha so many puns!), I think I'm doing most of my blogging on tumblr.

Seriously I think it's awesome; it's like the twitter version of blogging. You can easily find posts on any topic that you happen to fancy at the moment, follow/stalk others who have similar interests, and the best thing is, you can see all their posts all on one page, aka 'the dashboard' so you don't have to visit many individual pages. But anyway, my tumblr is only for media content, ie. videos, songs. So it's like the mistress to my blogger - only there to fulfil my meaningless whims and fancies, but not for anything serious. Not like my posts here are really insightful or thought-provoking.

Sigh.

I'm SO FRUSTRATED by my interviews. I've been to 10!!! 123456789 TEN. That's a record. Somehow I'm saying the right things, but it's just not enough. And maybe sometimes I'm really intimidated by long conference tables. Do I not seem like I want it bad enough?? How am I supposed to want something badly, when I don't even know what that something is? And how do I convey passion without going on my knees to beg?

Maybe I'm not really cut out for marketing. I'm tempted to start applying to agencies. An interviewer once told me that it's a good place to start if you're not sure which industry you wanna join. But I'm afraid of the long hours/crappy pay and facing the wrath of clients. Maybe it'll be a good training ground for me to start cultivating patience and a calm temperament.

I really need to trust and hold on to His promise that there's a reason for all this waiting. And that it'll all be worth it in the end.

Anyhoo, really love the song below. If you weren't listening closely to the lyrics, you'd think they were singing about sunshine and rainbows. Heartbreak never sounded so fun.

Cults - Abducted by cultscultscults

He broke my heart cuz I really loved him