nothing else will do

On one hand, I can't wait to leave this place, cuz it means finishing my exams, and starting my holiday (California!). On the other hand, I can't bear to leave cuz I'd miss everything here.

So I was talking to Alex about this, and he said, "The good life is what you enjoy, not what you leave behind." Cheem hor. Anyway his explanation is: "I have good times here, when it is over, it is over. But there were good times. But everyone one moves on. And I move on too, for more good times ahead like everyone else. We might or might not reunite for good times again but whatever. We had good times in the past. Sadness is just after the good times end. After that, it is good to know that it happened. That's that."

Which is true. There's no point holding on to the past, we all gotta move on. The more I think about the past, and how I wish I could reclaim them, the more miserable I'm gonna get. I need to live in the moment, and not "what was/could have been". It doesn't mean that I have to lose my memories, but rather that I hang on to them for what they are, instead of constantly moping that I can't relive them again.

Then again, I don't know if I miss the good times, or the people that contributed to them. Cuz I find it hard to be emotionally attached to someone I've only known for 4 months haha. Unless we share alot with each other. Ah, I don't know la. I'll deal with the situation again when it comes in 2 weeks.

For now, I have to start mugging for my exams! My first paper is this Thurs haha. Crap. I can't seem to run away from exams, no matter how far away I am. I can run away from studying for them though ahaha. And I have to start packing rahhh.

Oh, by the way, we were over in San Antonio this weekend (Fri and Sat only, actually). The place is seriously like Mexico man. All the Latinos. But I had lotsa fun! We saw the historic sites like the Alamo and the Missions, visited the Mexican market, and watched the Fiesta parade. Did some shopping at the outlet mall also haha. And I DRANK COFFEE TODAY. Oh, FYI, I've been on an anti-coffee strike for the past 18 days cuz I was trying to wean myself off of my caffeine addiction. But I gave in today, cuz of the lack of sleep, and the need for energy. NOO. I have no principles!! This is bad.

Anyway, ok I'm going to sleep. Mugging commences tomorrow.

No amount of coffee, no amount of crying
No amount of whiskey, no amount of wine
No, nothing else will do
I've gotta have you, I've gotta have you

take it from me

What can I compare you to, a favorite pair of shoes?
Maybe my bright red boots if they had wings
Funny how we animate colorful objects saved
Funny how it's hard to take a love with no sting.

But come on take it, come on take it, take it from me
But come on take it, come on take it, take it from me (we've got a good life).

What can I compare you to, a window the sun shines through?
Maybe the silver moon, a smile rising
The magic of the fading day, satellites on parade
A toast to the plans we've made to live like kings.

I lose my breath despite the air
When the rain falls down I give in to despair
Pink magnolia in winter she doesn't care
if you don't show up to have another cup.

What can I compare you to, when everything looks like you?
I get a bit confused with every Spring
Flowers that bloom your eyes, hummingbirds side by side
My heart won't stay entirely in this rib caging

- The Weepies, "Take It From Me"

blessed :)

Sorry for being away for so long. Been busy haha. Nothing work-related though. I'm turning into a world-class slacker over here. Here's why:

1. I skip my morning classes. Heck, for each of the past 2 weeks, I've only gone to 4 out of my 10 classes.
2. I've gone 13 days without coffee! That's a record, for someone who bought 25 Dining Dollars (credit for campus food) just for coffee haha. Anyway, this is only possible because I don't go for my morning classes (see point no. 1 above), so I don't need coffee because I get enough sleep!
3. I've never woken up before 10am for the past 2 weeks.
4. Last Wed was the most unprepared presentation I've ever had. Basically I just went up and read from my script, which I only printed out 1 hour before the presentation. But the class instructor is really lenient with her grades, which was good haha.
5. I have time to bask in the sun. In fact, I actually feel damn relaxed. Like there's no meaning in my life haha.

In conclusion, I'm gonna have HUGE problems re-adjusting when I go home. I DON'T WANNA GO BACK TO NUS.

Anyway, as most of you all know, I just turned 21! Honestly, it doesn't feel any different from any other day. But my friends here really made the day really special for me :)))

Ok so, my roommate said she's gonna take me out for dinner, so I was like, "ok". And I thought it was just gonna be the both of us, which was fine with me. But at the restaurant, there were like 10 of my other friends waiting for me! Which really surprised me haha. I mean I had a feeling something like this was gonna happen cuz I haven't heard from my other friends all day, but I wasn't expecting to see so many people hah. So it was a pleasant surprise.

Clockwise from left: Travis (Alex's roommate), Camille (from France), Lauren (the one who planned everything!!), Lip Tong, me!, Lacy (the roommate), Alex, Jacobo (from Spain), Jennifer (Travis' girlfriend), Frisca, and Yessy.

Oh, the waitress at Outback Steakhouse (where we had dinner), gave me a free dessert too :D. Anyway, after dinner, they blindfolded me and drove me to this "secret" location (it was Lauren's place). It was damn funny, cuz my roommate actually stole a napkin from the restaurant to use as a blindfold hahah. And they left me blindfolded in the middle of the parking lot for a few minutes while they prepared the stuff, which made me feel like a kidnapped Chinese immigrant hahaha. So they led me down this trail, and removed my blindfold, where I was greeted with this sight:

Everyone was there! Including Lauren's friends, who I met when we were at the Bluebonnet Festival last weekend. Oh man, I was terribly touched haha.
I had a cake too :) And they even went through the trouble of giving me trick candles that kept relighting themselves, so I was huffing and puffing for a good 10 minutes, which explains why my face is like that in the picture hah. I got presents too! An ipod cover for my new ipod (heehee), chocolates, a frisbee, and body foam haha.

And after that, the drinking session everyone's (Alex and the French and Spanish, at least) been waiting for! Over here, you can only drink when you're 21, so it's a cause for celebration haha. It was really embarrassing, though. I was gone only after 1 and a half margaritas haha. Oh, we went to this place with $2 margaritas on Mondays haha. Yeah, so my face was red, I felt like puking (I eventually did, in the restroom), and I could barely stand properly. I can't hold my liquor man. And I had to stay over at Lauren's place (which was 3 mins away), cuz I couldn't make it back to my dorm.

Otherwise, I had a great time! Thanks to WWF for the hilarious and retarded video :)) It really brought back all the wonderful memories of all the dumb things we do haha. By the way, I still have the audio recordings we made at Simin's house for Pei when she left for the UK. One day we should definitely do a "WWF Greatest Hits" compilation ahah. Thanks to Joe also, for the headphones (and the accidental binoculars) and bag. And to Shuqi, for the book and the bag :D And to everyone who wished me happy birthday! It's times like these that I wished I could just fly back immediately to see you all. I MISS ALL OF YOU :))

Ok, a sad thing happened this weekend. I LOST MY SHOE!! The left side of my Converse sneakers are lost somewhere in a creek in Houston :(( Ok, it was also a dumb mistake on my part. Anywya we went over to Lauren's place for the weekend (and to see her family before we leave sob), and we brought her dog out for a walk, where we had to cross this creek. It's basically like a natural longkang, like a small stream. So I was crossing it barefoot, so I threw my shoes to the other side. But one of them bounced off the bank, and floated down the river. It was hilarious though haha. Cuz there I was, balancing precariously on rocks, ankle deep in rushing water, and freaking out over my shoe, which was floating downstream. Lauren tried to go after my shoe, but she got stung by a bee, which kinda ended the shoe-hunting affair haha. I felt sorry for her though, cuz she got the sting for my shoe, and her leg is still kinda swollen :(

Here's my precious shoe, which has been with me for the past 3 yrs. Full of sentimental value ok.

Anyway, I've been really blessed to have a bunch of wonderful people as my friends, and I really thank the Lord for this :) Especially over here, cuz they help to ease my homesickness, and really helped me experience so much more. I remember when I just got here, I was extremely depressed, and I prayed desperately for comfort. Now I'm really glad that the Lord has answered my prayers by putting great people in my life :))

But for now, I'm just gonna treasure the few weeks I have left here. (and slack as much as possible)

But I'd rather you be mean than love and lie
I'd rather hear the truth and have to say goodbye
I'd rather take a blow at least then I would know
But baby don't you break my heart slow

should've known better

Oh man, if I'm already woozy from just 1 beer, I dunno how I'm gonna survive my birthday.

So today started out as a bad day. Firstly, I received the wrong package from Amazon. Then my project group members didn't turn up for our meeting. But tonight was fun!! Dinner with the Spanish, and drinks with the French :D

Haha ok, that's all I have to say for now. I'm having a tremendous headache. Going to sleep. And tomorrow I'm off to the Bluebonnet Festival (the bluebonnet is the state flower of Texas)! I dunno what's going on there though, but I hope it'll be fun haha.

Au Revoir.

Now you'd think that I should've known better.
Now I think that I should've seen it come.

the long and short of it

Woots. Just came back from Dallas, to support Lauren and her friends who ran in a half-marathon (13 miles/21km)! It was crazy, cuz her family made signs and we basically rushed along points of the run to cheer them on. But yeah, at least they made it haha. I don't think I'd be able to last 3 miles, let alone 13 miles lor. Even if I made it, I probably would have collapsed at the finish line, but they didn't really look that tired haha. Well, except for Lauren, whose knee almost killed her so she was basically limping. So yeah, she's my new hero now haha.

We had to wake up at 5am for the race, so I'm really shagged out right now. Cuz the hotel sucks, and I couldn't sleep, and only got 2 and a half hours of sleep. I was kinda disappointed that we didn't have enough time to visit Dallas itself, and that we couldn't join the French, who were there also. But oh well, I'm just going for Lauren's sake. Cuz she's done so much for all of us, so the very least I could do is to turn up to support her haha.

Anyway, just wanna say once again that I'm really gonna miss the people I've met here, after I leave. Lauren, her friends, my crappy roommate, the French etc. They've really helped me out alot, and gave me alot of good times :) But then again, I really really miss my friends back in Singapore! Like even though the pple here are nice and all, they can't really compare to those at home. They don't understand me as well, and I'm not as comfortable with them as I am with my buddies back home. So yeah, I'm kinda homesick right now.

I MISS ALL OF YOU GUYS.

I see the sunshine in your eyes
I'll try the things you never try
I'll be the one that leaves you high, high, high

Easter weekend at Houston

Ok, finally, my long delayed entry about the Easter weekend, 2 weeks ago haha.

Lauren invited us over to her place over the weekend, and on Thurs we went to the Houston rodeo. Ooh man it was crazy there. They had all sorts of things going on: livestock shows (a farm animal exhibition, basically), carnival rides, lotsa food, pig races, the rodeo itself, and of course, countless people decked out in their cowboy gear. Yeah, Texas country at its finest haha.

Sausage on a stick, and a gigantic turkey leg.

At the livestock show. Pigs.
Ponies.

Cow asses lined up in a row.
Giant rabbits.
Thanksgiving came early this year (see "giant turkey leg" above)
Chicks!Sheep.

The rodeo!
Cowboy.

Er, I forgot what this event is called but basically those 2 cowboys had to lasso the calf, and jump down and tie up its legs as quickly as possible.
Bullriding. Woots. The competitors are judged on their "form", and they must stay on the bull for at least 8 seconds. Trust me, it's hard.
A loose bull.

Hahaha, this is a damn nonsense event. Basically, selected high school kids from around Texas gather here and try to grab a calf. If they can keep hold of it and drag it behind the white line, they are allowed to keep the calf.
Well, at least he still has a hold of his calf haha.
Mayhem.

Dierks Bentley (a country singer) concert.

The next morning (Fri), we drove down to Galveston, which is like Texas' beach town. It's not that nice really. The beach resembles Singapore's haha. The water was grey, and there was trash on the sand. But I had fun nonetheless haha.

Oh. The guys were throwing girls in, one at a time. Here I am, like a lamb being led to slaughter.
Then I put up a struggle, so they decided to haul me in.
Argh!!
Beach volleyball.

The infamous French game haha.

Lauren invited the French (and one Spanish) over for hamburgers haha. Here's the international posse: French, Spanish, Indonesians, Singaporeans, and 1 American.
They kinda look like each other haha.

Err. Crazy Euros.
Again.
Intense discussion.

Ooh, the next day, we had a crawfish boil! Crawfish are like a smaller version of lobsters, with pincers. They live in the mud, instead of at sea. And they're delicious haha. Basically you just throw tons of them into a huge pot, add seasoning, and you have a great meal.

We put up that tent ok!
A tub of crawfish. That's Lauren's Korean friend, Yire.

Crawfish, up close.
Yummy.
Laura (Lauren's friend, yes I know it's confusing ahha) likes to play with the dead crawfish, instead of eating them like she's supposed to haha.

We had an easter egg dyeing session after dinner, and after our hot tub session :D
The kitten in the pool table.

Us, with Lauren's family! They were really great hosts to all of us, and her mum makes the greatest meals!! Oh man, every meal is a surprise haha. I seriously think I gained alot of weight after that weekend. Her mum also gave us an Easter basket. Apparently, it's an American tradition to give your kids Easter baskets with stuff like candy, inside. It's like a mini-Christmas haha.

So yeah, I had a blast! I'm really thankful that we met Lauren, and that she's willing to hang out and host a bunch of Chinese haha. It's liek people like her that make my exchange seem worthwhile :)

Oh no, my feelings are more important than yours.
Oh, drop dead, I don't care, I won't worry.

always something else

Ok, I'm gonna make this short. This is just to let everyone know I'm still alive (and because my laptop is dying) haha. Sorry that I haven't been blogging for so long, I've been very busy with work and exams. Gahh.

I think after being in the Singaporean education system for so long, studying has been ingrained into my system haha. I can't help not studying. If I slack for a while I'll be ridden with guilt until I do something about it haha. But believe me, I'm leading a much more relaxed lifestyle here. There's something to do every weekend (non-academic stuff of course), and if there's nothing to do and the weather is nice, it's good to go out and lie on a patch of grass and bask in the sun :D We even nicknamed a patch of grass "dream hill" hahah.

But then again, I'm sick of school. I'm counting down the days to my end-of-semester break. Woots. California! The sun, sand, and sea! 5 more weeks!! Ahahah. Hmm but I don't really wanna leave College Station. The people are nice (people who are nicer than Singaporeans are nice in my book), the weather is great, and I've made really fun and great friends.

Ok I promise I'll blog about Spring Break, and my Easter weekend (which in my opinion, was one of the bestest weekends I've ever had!) sooooon. I'm still waiting to receive the photos haha. They're currently being passed around. But you all can still check out my Facebook photos. Oh this weekend was great too, though it's technically still not over haha. I spent like the previous 2 nights at Lauren's place (it's like my second home now I think), though only 1 of them was on purpose. We mostly just hung around and watched movies. Last night was by accident cuz the 2 Indos fell alseep, so like wth, stay another night lor haha. Oh and tonight, we had a potluck with the French, with lotsa food and fun. Man, now I hate going back to school :(

There's always something else on my mind
There's always something I can't find