I think giving yourself deadlines for work is like setting New Year resolutions. You never get round to doing them, despite the lofty ideals you had in the first place. Of course, when the REAL deadlines loom nearer, you have no choice but to dig deep and just pia.
But in the meantime, watching shows online/on TV will do.
The story of my life.
I think procrastination should be included in the "Deadly Sins". Or maybe it's under "Slothery" (is that a word? Slothiness? Slothy?). The point is, it is deadly. But I can't control myself!!
And if my heart should somehow stop I’ll hang on, to the hope That you’re not too late
Saturday, February 27, 2010
After CNY, comes CP. No surprise there haha.
What I really need now is balance in everything, from my responsibilities and obligations to my emotions.
Taking things one step at a time has never been more important. That goes the same for my walk with God.
But I'm grateful for every little accomplishment/crossed hurdle along the way :)
Well, I've been afraid of changing Cause I've built my life around you
Thursday, February 11, 2010
CNY with so many dietary restrictions is not CNY.
I'm at home drowning in self-pity and misery while my family is out having fish head curry :( Not that I can't join them, just that there's no point in looking at people eat food you can't eat. I hate this.
Hives + cramps + CP = Emo elmo and "Why-is-this-happening-to-me??"
Don't know what they are? I didn't know till last night, when it turned me into a panicking wreck.
"Urticaria, also known as hives, is an outbreak of swollen, pale red bumps or plaques (wheals) on the skin that appear suddenly -- either as a result of the body's adverse reaction to certain allergens, or for unknown reasons." -WebMD
I can confirm that they're damn gross. And it's true that sometimes no one knows why they come about. They're sneaky and mysterious, like they'd suddenly appear in one area then disappear and re-appear elsewhere. It's making me paranoid cuz I keep checking for new spots haha. I just hope I'd get better before CNY :(
On the good side, it gives rise to funny conversations like this:
adelyne. now much better, except will still have random patches here and there no one knows what i'm allergic to haha and like the patches will come and go, like will suddenly appear in 1 spot then disappear and appear elsehwere make me paranoid lor, cu zi keep checking for new spots haha and i think will take a few days to fully recover :(
huajia ))) i read "cu zi" i thought you take off your pants every now and then to check for new patches HAHAHA i read as ku zi
adelyne. hahahaha!!! well i do that too but you werent supposed to know
huajia HAHAHHAH ((())) i help you check?
Well, I'll just treat it as another one of God's freak acts of nature haha.
Heart skipped a beat And when I caught it you were out of reach But I'm sure, I'm sure You've heard if before
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Ya and I have time to do bo liao pie charts right.
You're the shit and I'm knee-deep in it
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
11am, and I've already had 2 cups of coffee. I've got the caffeine shakes!!
It's gonna be a loooong sem :(
Everybody says time heals everything But what of the wretched hollow? The endless in between Are we just going to wait it out?
To celebrate my new blog layout (not that it's very pretty haha), here is my sort-of reflection for 2009/resolution for 2010. I know it's a bit late la, but better late than never right!
2009 has been a relatively peaceful year for me I think. Like nothing phenomenally good/bad happened. I went through the motions in school (with the usual whining and moaning), failed to pull my CAP up to where I would like it to be, chased after kids in Sentosa, went to Vietnam, sent more friends off :(, did PR for a month, and *poof* it's 2010 already.
I've had really stressful moments in 2009, the most recent incident being when I was trying to juggle work, CP, and Brandstorm all at once, all during my holidays when I was supposed to be playing and avoiding stress at all cost. I wanted to cry during that time man. But I'm really glad that God really provided and saw me through December, as well as all the other stressful times throughout the year. Looking back, I can honestly say I had fun. Work wasn't as bad as expected (except when I made mistakes :S). I met some really nice people, and learnt quite a lot :)
Relationships-wise, I've had quite a few misunderstandings with friends. But I can't say that it was all for the better. I guess we all change, and if we drift apart then so be it. If we manage to see past all our differences next time, then good. But for now I'm just happy the real important people are still hanging around in my life haha.
I guess I can say it was a good year. I managed to get through the tough times relatively unscathed, and had fun during the good times :) Does this mean 2010 is gonna be really bad? Like maybe 2009 was a preparation for 2010. I hope not.
Ok, enough of the past (I can't remember much anyway). For 2010:
1) I need to be less judgmental of other people, and the decisions they make. It's ok if we disagree with each other, and others don't think the same way I do. I have to respect their choices, and support them regardless. Well not exactly, especially when I think it's a wrong decision. I guess it's enough to just shut up and stand aside sometimes, instead of constantly forcing your own opinions onto them.
2) It's ok to give and not receive as much as you expect in return. I think everyone knows this, but it's seriously very hard to put into action. Being humans, we expect others to reciprocate with the same amount of effort/time/concern/money we put into them. So we become disappointed and upset when the other party is seemingly oblivious or unappreciative, and we wonder if it's worth it, and just how much is enough to give. We forget that the main purpose of our giving is to show concern for the other person, and not to satisfy our sense of self-gratification. As Christians especially, we've been called to love others as Christ first loved us. It's our duty to love others, even go the extra mile for them, and we don't have the right to demand equal reciprocation from others. But ya, it's really hard to do, and it's something I'm still learning.
3) On the same note, I need to be more forgiving of others. Forgetting is hard, and forgiving is even harder. Sometimes, even after I forget, I still can't properly forgive. I think I just need a bigger heart.
4) I have to cultivate a spirit of dependence on God, instead of trying to rely on my own feeble human ability. I need to continue to turn to Him in both good and bad times. During busy times especially, it's very easy to forget that God is there. When we're so busy going through the motions, we fail to see the clear purpose of why we're doing what we're doing. Then it becomes easy to lose hope and focus. I need to remember to take a step back from life often, and reflect on what I'm doing and whether it is glorifying to God. He hasn't failed me yet, and He definitely won't fail me in the days ahead :)
5) I need to be less dependent on the company of others. It doesn't mean that I'm supposed to be happy being alone, just that I'll be ok when friends leave. The world won't end just cuz I have fewer friends to hang out with (ie. whine and complain to). Friends come and go. I just have to get used to it, and treasure those that are around.
6) As for the perennial question of, "Why am I still single?" I've decided that there's no point worrying over this. It's all up to God's divine timing. If it happens, it happens. Maybe He's decided that I'm not ready yet. But I must admit that it's hard to not worry about this, especially when you're surrounded by couples everywhere. It takes a lot of faith to trust that He is working His hand in all of this, and that He has someone out there for me. I guess the more important thing for me to work at is in being the right girl for the right guy (if and when he comes along).
7) 2010 is probably gonna be tumultous and full of changes, what with me graduating and working (pray I'll find a job :S). I wonder how I'm gonna cope. I wonder if my usual mentality of 'I can get used to anything with time.' will still work. It's the process of getting used to something that is painful I think haha. Then again, once I've gotten over the hurdle, I realized that it was actually just to prepare me for bigger hurdles ahead. "What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger." So this year, I need to remember this mantra through whatever shit life throws at me. And anyway, back to point (4), with God by my side I can get through anything. I just need to trust in Him, and trust that whatever happens is for a reason and for a greater purpose that I cannot fathom just yet.
And just a sidenote:
6) Sleep early + wake early = good for the body.
Come out to meet me Run out to meet me Come into the light
The story of my life. 
