1. Dinner with Mum and bro.

2. Nice Jap dinner in my belly.

3. Impromptu supper at 11pm!

4. Driving late at night, with the radio up and me singing at the top of my voice.

5. ANTM!

I'd say it was a pretty good night :)

Happy song! -

I'm already out
of foolproof ideas,
so don't ask me how to get started,
it's all uncharted

The single Rose
Is now the Garden
Where all loves end
Terminate torment
Of love unsatisfied
The greater torment
Of love satisfied
End of the endless
Journey to no end
Conclusion of all that
Is inconclusible
Speech without word and
Word of no speech
Grace to the Mother
For the Garden
Where all love ends.

- T.S. Eliot, "Ash Wednesday"

I've been reading T.S. Eliot lately, and feeling really impressed by his mastery of words.

The things that get me the most excited about (besides traveling), are the moments when I discover a really great band/singer, or a really great writer. There's this huge rush of excitement where I want to read/listen to every work, that at the same time is reined in by the fear that if I consume everything too quickly I won't be able to make the moment (and joy) last. Confusing, but true haha.

And then I feel like I need to share this joy with the rest of the world, which explains the random posting of tracks/videos/excerpts (I even have another blog for this purpose). I want everyone else to experience what I'm feeling. Sadly, my social circle has different tastes, which brings us back to why I go for concerts solo. But that's another story for another day. Anyway, so when I do find a fellow 'kindred' soul, I get so excited that I'd gladly set aside whatever I'm doing (usually unimportant in the first place anyway) to send some songs over or even burn a CD.

I think the gift of song and the gift of writing is rare and to be treasured, yet meant to be shared with the rest of the world. It's amazing how an awesome song/performance can stir one's emotions and resonate something inside you didn't even know you had. It can change the mood and atmosphere of a place and person. It gives hope (and maybe sometimes drive you to depression, but in a good way haha), and succeeds where words otherwise fail. This is probably why series like "Glee" are so popular haha. Music speaks to all of us, no matter the genre. A good book/poem does the same too I think. I'm amazed by how someone I've never even met is able to put my emotions into just a few lines of wonderfully-placed words which when separate don't make sense at all.

I think I'm really just awed by the fact that we as human beings, have been created by God to be distinct from animals such that we are able to feel, to give and take these feelings, and in turn, use them to create works of art that can reach others and stir up a plethora of emotions in them. Wonderful, no? And for this I give thanks :)

I'll try
But I couldn't be better

Wow it's almost been a month! It's MARCH already! Soon it'll be April, and I'll officially be 24.

Sadly, I don't have much to show for.

It's surprising how your days pass by so quickly even when you're not doing anything. Really, they seem to just blur together. I dunno if that's good or bad.

I want a change in my life. Not just my current circumstances, but life in general and in the long term. I feel like I haven't achieved much in my 24 years of existence - maybe just completing my education? Should aiming for a great career be my goal? Cuz somehow I don't see myself doing that.

I think this idle-ness is getting to me.

And disappointingly, as much as I have been sending in job applications, I haven't received any calls for interviews. I'm starting to think those 6 months are a blemish on my record. Or maybe my phone isn't working.

The Wilderness of Manitoba - Hermit

Will you ever know me,

The way I think you should

tik and also tok

This is the reason why I love Glee.



I love it when they re-invent songs and make them even than better the original. I also love the intro by Principal Figgins, "Tik and also Tok by rapper Ke-Dollar Sign-Ha".

Ok granted the episode was about drinking, and although it was supposed to be about why alcohol is BAD for you, to me it came off a little more like it was glorifying it. Esp given the amount of fun they seemed to be having in the show. I hope there aren't too many tweens watching :S

Oh well, as much as the episode made me wanna go out and party, I'm a complete boor when inebriated, ie. I turn lobster-red, and puke or pass out. As opposed to "weepy-hysterical" or "happy-girl drunk" (as illustrated in the show). I guess it's true. After experiencing the BAD effects of booze, you sorta get scared into NOT wanting to repeat them.

Oh but there was this scene in this country honky-tonk bar where pple were line-dancing together to the music! That brought back memories of Texas, cuz it really does happen there. It's like Singapore's mambo, but with feet and minus the crazy hand gestures. I remember dancing together in one line with a bunch of strangers, all the while trying not to step on their toes. Good times :D

And have I mentioned that ANTM and Amazing Race are back!?!? In Kaishi's words, "my buddy, life begins again!" :)

In other news on the unemployment front, I've been in a big fat lazy funk (not the dancing kind). I'm soooo lazyyyyy. And I'm so borreeddddddddddd (as evident from the increase in my fb/blogging activity, and they're all meaningless posts too). Well not really, I've been doing church stuff - helping out with props for the musical and trying to get my act together so I can lead a Bible study session.

Anyhoo, this is an awesome (albeit much quieter) song.



You’re the only one that hurts,
Only one that hurts me more than a little bit

What I love about concerts is the experience, and because you really get to see the effort an artiste puts in to make it worthwhile for the audience. I usually either dislike/have more love for an artiste after their concert. And I'm glad today's was the latter.

It was a rare chance to see Rachael Yamagata perform solo and acoustic in an intimate setting without her band, and it was worth the awkwardness of having to go alone (although I saw several other loners like me haha). Although she flubbed some of the lyrics, and her guitar was slightly off-tune, the performance was still mind-blowing and awesome. The smaller stage and acoustics really enhanced everything, though I think her voice will still sound awesome wherever haha. What I really loved was her easy banter and willingness to share her thoughts/feelings, even going as far as to share her past relationships and even that she's in the midst of a break-up (aww), or joking that her songs are depressing/suicidal haha. Most bands just go up there, do their thing, and go off.




(That's me trying to be artistic with the photo haha.)

And of course she had an eager audience which lapped up everything she gave out haha. It helped that she wasn't afraid to laugh at herself (especially when she couldn't remember lyrics/chords), and even got the audience to sing along at some parts.

This being the first time I attend a concert alone, I made sure I went all the way and queued up for an autograph (first time also, and probably the last) haha. I usually don't believe in being a groupie, so this is a big step. Anyway I got a photo, and got RY to sign my ticket and iPhone cover (she said it's nice btw)!! It's a crazy move, and totally unlike me, but I'm glad I did it. Absolutely made my dayyy! :)) Though it looks like it's time to get a new cover haha.


:D

Ok as much as I would like to document everything, I shall stop being an obsessive fan.

And it'll be just as quiet when I leave
As it was when I first got here

Updates:

My time in Jurong is finally done! I dunno how I feel though - a mixture of happiness and wistfulness? My colleagues were the best people I could've ever asked to work with, and I'm glad they've become more than just colleagues. They made my days more bearable, and provided lots of fun and laughter. Will really miss them :(

They've set a really high benchmark of expectations for my future colleagues that I'm really worried will not be met. Like what if the people at my next job are a bunch of meanies?

Then again, I'm also glad to be leaving. At least people can stop asking, "So when is your last day again?" haha. This is sort of the end of a memorable, albeit short, chapter in my life. I can't say I didn't come away with anything, cuz I did. I really learnt a lot; things like being aware of the different little nuances that can convey anything and everything, thinking before speaking, and the many different shades people come in. In the real world, there's no black and white. Just many many greys. And I guess I know more about navigating through all these things, though I'm still far from being an expert.

So now I'm in the transition period haha. Again. I feel kinda aimless, though I hope it won't be meaningless. Right now I don't think my priority is in finding a new job (I mean, it is in a way) but in really seriously considering what I want and seek for my next position. I can't say, "I won't know what I like until I try it" anymore. Cuz then it'll be a repeat of the previous job, and this time I won't be able to just pat my backside and leave.

So I'm really praying for wisdom and guidance in my decisions, for God to reveal His purpose and plans for me. And of course, for me to use my free time wisely and meaningfully. If this is God's season for me to be unoccupied, I pray it'll be fruitful and this period will help me to sort out my thoughts, priorities, and really use it to grow in my spiritual life (been slacking a lot recently).

Oh and I went ahead and bought a Rachael Yamagata ticket! Haha madness. I was literally camping in front of the com (at work :S) waiting for ticket sales to start. And they sold out in 5 mins! Woots, so really glad I managed to get my hands on 1. This will be my virgin experience of being a loner at a concert though. I just hope with the chaotic ticket sales, there'll be plenty of others like me haha.



But I'm the one that's acting like I'm so strong
You're the one that's acting like nothing's wrong

music sampling

Sooo many of my fav bands are coming to Singapore but I have no one to see them with! WHY. It's so hard to find people who share the same tastes in music. I need more friends :(

Is it sad to go to a concert alone? Cuz I'm really tempted to do it, esp for Rachael Yamagata. I know it'll totally be worth the awkwardness of sitting by myself haha.





Since I'm at it, I might as well share other favs:

Phoenix! Awesome French band that sings in English. They make me wanna get up and dance haha.





KT Tunstall is cool in this video cuz she's a one-woman band. She beatboxes, then records it on this machine that loops it so it becomes the beat of the song. And she plays the guitar, and whistles!



And of course, The National. Their music moves me. Regret not buying tickets to their upcoming gig.







We're half awake in a fake empire